A long time ago, in the land of Hyrule, 1000 years after Link the Great died, he did have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. They became to have children. And then…. Vincent was born. Vincent was other then the rest… he had the Triforce mark. He didn`t knew it, but he would be come the greatest warrior ever known. It all started when he was 10. He heard about his grand-grand-grand-gra – YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! – parent. The wielder of the Triforce of Courage, Link. How Link defeated Ganondorf, but was killed by his loved one, Zelda. Vincent looked at his hand palm… “That is the same mark… COOL!” He started to think.. how he might have the enormous power of Triforce… he kept on reading, learning lots of stuff about history. “Today children we are having a history test about Link The Great!” Everybody said BOOOO, but Vincent: YAAY! Everybody looked weird at him. Of course, Vincent was the only one to get a A+. More then 10 years later, something strange happened… the Triforce mark started to glow! He heard voices, and at night… “WAKE UP, DINGBAT! Ain`t got all time! I`m just a spirit too, you know.” “WHAT THE FUCK?! WHO ARE YOU?!” “Relax… i`m Naraka.” “Where are you? Who are you?” “YU NO SEE ME?! Okay… I am small. I`m a black fairy. I was sent by The Sword… to get you. It`s the day you become twenty. It`s time.” “Time to sleep! Yes indeed!” “No! See your mark?! IT`S GLOWING MAN! THAT MEANS YOU ARE NEEDED TO SAVE THE WORLD, DINGUS!” “ WTF?! So, that`s why it is glowing…” “Smartass, you have the Triforce of Universe! The thingy in the center of your handpalm! Don`t you know what its power is?! I`ll give ya a teleport to The Sword!” Vincent and Naraka transported to a tomb. “Where are we, Naraka?” “ We`re in that badass statue of Link! He left The Sword to the one who was going to bare the Triforce of Uni-“ “I know. Anyways… is that-“ “Yes indeed, bro. The stand where the Blade of the Devil is sealed… it`s your job to unleash it`s power.” “I don`t want all this…” “You don`t have a choice, do you? Else we`ll all die. Would you be happy, dingbat? I guess not!” “Hello… master.” A voice sounded. “Come get me out of this dirty stand, so I will be able again to kill! I want to get out of the Tomb of the Hero!” It was the Blade of the Devil. “I bet I got no choice.” Vincent walked up to the stand, put his hand on the hold of the sword, and pulled it out. “Where should I started with explaining, master?” “At the beginning, please.” Vincent said, confused by everything that happened in the past hour. “Your GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND-father was-“ “Don`t tell me shit I already know, okay?” ”You are destined to save the world though you never handled any weapon before and you got no idea what to do. Ganondorf returned. Younger. He should be around 20, just like you. ARE WE CLEAR?!” “… Yes.” “Good, i`m gonna teach you how to handle the powers of the Triforce of Universe while Naraka will be the best bud you`ve ever known.” “Do you always talk that much?” “ Yes I do indeed.” “What do I have to do now then…?””Uhh, track and kill “Ganondorf”.” “O.o I CAN`T! I`M UNSKILLED!” “I`m gonna make you skilled. You are going to do lots of things, just to make this story longer and because Y U NO SKILLED! ARE WE CLEAR?!” “Yes, sir! Can I now have an ice cream?” “Yes.” “I WANT STRAWBERRY!” Naraka screamed. “Whateves… I can`t even eat ice cream… i`m a sword!” Blade of the Devil complained. SWORD FAIL! Sorry, writer fun. Anyways, they went to get an ice cream when a friend arrived. “Hello Vincent. Whoa, what`s with the sword and fairy?! Wanna go slaying evil with me?” “Raven, I gotta ask you something. Would you help me please?” And Vincent explained everything to Raven. “Of course i`ll help you! But don`t forget: You are the chosen one. I am not supposed to do everything. After all, you wield Blade of the Devil.” “Hey, I live too.” “Shut it, BotD.” “Sorry, Master.” “Well, we have a deal, Vincent?” “Deal! Now lets eat an ice cream.” “Vincent, in emoticon world, i`d be double dot uppercase d.” AFTER THEY ATE THEIR ICE CREAM “Well, Raven, Naraka, BotD, let`s head to… GOD KNOWS WHERE!” “So, Vincent, you asked me to help, but you have no idea where to head?” “No…. anyways… let`s head off to Faron Woods. Maybe “Ganondorf” is there!”
IN THE BEGINNING OF FARON WOODS “Whoa! That`s one HUGE spider!” And Vincent & Co. where in front of a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE Skulltula…. Ouch... “I`ve heard they eat Hylians.” Raven said. “I KNOW they eat Hylian-flesh.” Vincent said.“ Raven pulled her sword. “Don`t! You can only hurt them by stabbing in their belly.” Vincent said. “I suggest… NARAKA! DISTRACT THE GUY!” “How?” “BY SHINING, DUMBASS!” “MUMPH!” And Naraka flied rounds in front of the Skulltula. The Skulltula tried to EAT Naraka… but the dumbass flipped over. Raven flew up and fell down with her sword pointing downward. Raven VS Skulltula: Raven 1, Skulltula 0. A man in armor arrived. Everything turned dark. “Hello… what are you doing in MY domain? I WON`T TOLERATE YOU DISTURBING MY REST!” But then, the guy saw Vincent’s Triforce mark. “You. You are… HOLDER OF THE TRIFORCE OF UNIVERSE! Join me, please.” “On what?” Vincent asked. “I want to rule the world with the power given to me thanks to my ancestor: Ganondorf, the king of evil. You possess the Triforce gift which is the strongest. The Triforce of Universe. Think about it… Vincent.” “How do you know my name?” “You know mine, do you?” Vincent concentrated. “Arthuros…” “WAIT A SEC?! YOU HAVE THE MARKS?!” Raven asked. “I have it too…..” “Triforce of Wisdom, logical. Wait a sec… in that case… YOU ARE MY SISTER!” “OMFG! You are my brother, Vincent!” “Yeah, very cute. Vincent… we would rule the world… by the way… do you know what happened with the Triforce of Courage?” “No, I don`t Arthuros. And FYI, I am bonded to sa-“ “I know. Prophecies can lie too. I feel your power emanating from you body… JOIN ME, AND WE WILL RULE THE UNIVERSE!” And Arthuros performed an excellent evil laugh. “So what do you think? I already got the Sword of the Seven Sages. I know how you can use your power. Join me. Please.” “IDK…” Vincent and Raven said at the same time… “ Can you give me and Raven a moment?” “Sure.” “Vincent, i got no idea what to do…” “BotD? Got an idea?” “No… I don`t know if i`ll trust the prophecy or him.” “Naraka, you?” “I don`t know!” “I don`t believe him…” Vincent said. “We got to kill him.” BotD: “WAIT! First i`ll teach you how to use your powers. You just got to want to do something. If you want to, the chances are high it`ll happen. But you got to master it. For now, just try to shoot a beam of pure power out of your Triforce mark.” They turned their faces to Arthuros. Vincent went to him to give him a handshake… or not? Vincent turned his hand and shot a beam of pure power at Arthuros. Arthuros was highly wounded, but he used his power to teleport. “Where did he went?” Vincent asked to BotD. “How should I know? I am not a psychic. You`ll have to search the world over.” “Is that an option?” Raven asked. “No. It is not.” Vincent replied. “Raven… try to think. I`ve read it is possible to sense where someone is as holder of the Triforce of Wisdom. You just need to find Arthuros` scent.” “Okay… i`ll try. I… I feel something strange in the air.” “Good, good! Focus!” “I think I know where he went… but you are not going to like it.” “Tell me.” “I think he is at Ganondorfs grave.” “HE IS GOING TO RESSURECT GANONDORF! We got to go back to Castle Town! But we can`t stop the freako…” “That ain`t a word.” “Shut it Naraka. Let`s just call him psycho. We got to stop him with brute force… first, we gotta find the holder of the Triforce of Courage. Wait! I GOT A PLAN! IF HE`S GONNA RESSURECT GANONDORF, WE ARE GOING TO RESSURECT LINK!” So they headed to the grave of Link.
ONCE THERE. “Okay… how do we resurrect him?” Vincent asked to BotD. “Just… give him life force.” “OMFG! EVERY ZELDA GAME STARTS WITH THREE HEART CONTAINERS! SO I GOT TO LAY 3 HEARTS ON HERE?!” “Yes, you do indeed.” “CRAPDAMNIT! Eww… let`s kill those bats. And cut there hearts out.” So they did. They laid the three hearts on the grave. Something started to move in the chest. “This is so gross…” And Link raise out of the grave. “Who. Resurrected. Me?” “I did, GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANDFATHER. I am Vincent. I am holder of the Triforce of Universe. This is my sister, Raven. Holder of the Triforce of Wisdom. Some weirdo is going to resurrect Ganondorf. We got to take a stand. I got the Blade and I met Naraka.” “How very appreciated this is for resurrecting me… Vincent, you are not ready.” “That`s why I got you.” “That is… smart. Let`s go to Ganondorfs grave. Let`s end his life again!” So, they headed to ANOTHER graveyard. Gosh, I don`t like graveyards. But who gives a fuck? When they arrived at the graveyard, Ganondorfs grave was gone. Ganondorf, the Resurrected King of Evil, became Ganondorf, the Resurrected Resurrected King of Evil.